I am tired this holiday season. And having a hard time getting into the holiday spirit, even my favorite parts (which are planning holiday gatherings, buying gifts for my people, and Yuletide). I have cut way back on the planning for our holiday gatherings (I didn't even include all my lists in the last group email), which leaves me feeling slightly stressed and off-balance, but is better for me in the long run. Things will get done, or they won't, and no matter what, we'll have a good time together. We always do.

(Saturday is the first, Group Gathering with Sister K, her husband, J, his brother J2, our friend G, and our other friend J3, plus J and J2's mom, who is visiting from Hawaii. Then Christmas Eve, we have our first family gathering, and Christmas day will be the second family gathering. Only three big gatherings is a pretty small number, and I'm hoping it will be delightful and relaxing, too.)

(I'm also hoping to spend a lot of Christmas day reading Yuletide. Yuletide. I want my Yuletide joy back, and here's hoping I can manage it. I love my assignment, love the story that is coming out of it, and can't wait to read my gift, but oh, where is my Yuletide joy?)

I think I am struggling more than I anticipated with finding joy in light of the deaths in the family. (We had one, and at the same time, Sister K's family in law had one, and then shortly after those two, a third which overlapped the families.) Plus I have been sick lately, and it just isn't a great time.

However, I am almost done shopping for Group Gathering (I just need to hit up an art supply store that was closed when I left work today), and then all I have to do is wrap gifts once I get down there Saturday. We're doing breakfast for dinner, which means biscuits and gravy and mimosas! (Biscuits and gravy is my favorite food.) Plus a bunch of other stuff, but my fave. I am done shopping for my secret giftee for the family gathering, and for Dad and the nephew. I need to buy for the niece, and then I will be done with shopping for the first family gathering. I haven't really started shopping for the second family gathering, but J and I are going to figure that out this weekend.

I also haven't really started shopping for the group of friends with whom I exchange gifts, so, as usual, those packages are going to go out late. Also, I think the rental office has a box of mail for me; I think my mailbox filled while I was gone for Mom's funeral, and I didn't realize it, but apparently they have mail I need to pick up. Unfortunately, the only time I am here while they're open is on the weekend, and I'll be out of town this weekend and next weekend, so it might be awhile before I can grab it. (This is the first year I've purchased an ebook as a gift, and I am pleasantly surprised by how easy Smashwords made it. That reminds me, I need to buy a few more copies still.)

I've almost finished my Yuletide story. I think I know where the ending is going, but I'm not quite there yet, so I guess that could change. Then I will consider a treat or two, and December Drabbles, of course.

Rough holiday season. Rough year. But there are good things.

I thought I'd have more time to be on here this week, but it doesn't look like I will, so I'm going to announce this now. Starting Saturday, I will be out of town for a holiday and then for WisCon 31, and won't be back until May 29. I don't know how much internet access I'll have, so I expect to be out of touch for awhile.

If anything happens and you would like me to know about it, please leave me a comment here, or send me an email at escritoireazul@gmail.com.

Sad thing, this time last year I was in the middle of the best holiday in the world. It involved Florida, lots and lots of Stitch, Cry_Wolf and Serenity, and, the most important part, Sarah.

I miss my best friend.

So this post is not all random Vin Diesel squee (thoughtfully put behind the cut so you aren't forced to see what a silly thing I am when it comes to him), I have a question. I don't even know if any of you live in the area, though I think at least one of you does, but if you were going to be in Salt Lake City the last week of May/first week of June (that crossover week, I like to call it), what would you do? I've been to SLC a couple of times, mostly driving through it to other places, and I know the lake is beautiful and I'd like to see the zoo, but other than that, I have no idea. I'm there for five days, more or less, right after Wiscon, visiting J. and his family.

I am really behind on livejournal, plus I have been in a mood where I have to force myself to either not take things personally or not come across like a total bitch. The way I deal with that mood is to go off the radar for awhile, but I think I just about have it under control.

I'm watching An American Werewolf In London. Not only do I love this movie, but I love this song. It makes me want to write. Werewolf stuff, of course, but just write in general, too. It also makes me want to lift heavy weights. Which I did today (okay, not heavy, but I lifted, yay!), and now feel wonderful.

( Vin Diesel squee )

La Scala Choir singing "I Touch Myself" is--well, I'd say the best music in the world, but it's not. However, it is absolutely fabulous and it is the best version I've heard of the song. Choral performance of a masturbation song? Brilliant.

I have not slept. I am only a little tired now. Instead I have cleaned, watched a disgusting number of fanvids, read Baby-sitters Club fanfic, and am currently writing my parts of the Homecoming storyline in "Queertet Revisited" which I love.

Over holiday, thestalkycop and I came up with how the story is going to end. We practically crowed, like good Pans, we were so thrilled with our decisions. It's a delicious storyline (well, storylines, really) and we will tie them all up nicely. Go us.

We've also been talking about songs for various characters. This was way more fun in person, in front of the pool (or in the pool), while smoking flavored cigarettes. Damn it, why can't we be on holiday always? Oh right, because then it would be real life.

Much better real life if we lived together all the time. I am so going to go be an illegal alien someday and crash on their couch.

Um, so I kept saying I could wear my black boots instead of new black strappy shoes? Since I couldn't find strappy shoes and my black boots are fun? Well, that plan would work so much better if I knew where the black boots were. I went looking for them tonight and no luck. I know I had them when I first moved up here, because I wore them to job interviews, but once I snagged a job where I can wear trainers, I haven't thought about the boots. And now I have no freaking clue. Crap.

This next week might possibly be insane. Except remove might possibly and insert absolutely already is. I have even started packing, but I have so much to do. Crap crap crap.

However, in less than six days I will be on holiday with thestalkycop and scouseboy. Woo! I was going to whinge about how I'd ordered gifts for them (and something for me for the trip) last week and it was supposed to ship and be here in two days and I hadn't even received the shipping confirmation email, but I just did and the box is due to arrive Tuesday. My pants are due to arrive tomorrow. Which means I then add hemming to my to do list.

Time to write it and get some sleep.

( to do list is here )

thestalkycop do you want me to bring the Lost DVDs with me on holiday? Because they were waiting for me when I got home from the gym, oh yay. No extra DVD, because Best Buy online apprently hates me. Does anyone have a copy they'd be willing to burn? Or let me download from you? Because I want it and I bought from Best Buy just for that damn CD and well I don't have it.

I also received books today. Teen fiction, mostly, plus the Emma Frost Higher Learning graphic novel. I already want the next one and the next and the next. I adore Emma. She reminds me of Shauna so much.

It is nearly time for bed. One more day and then it is the weekend. I can box up clothes for donations, box up books for donations, do laundry, clean, buy nail polish, and start to pack. (I am kidding. I will make lists, but I won't actually start packing until next Friday night. Maybe at 3 a.m. Saturday morning because I am a big packing slacker. However, when I get started, I get it done fast.)

I also bought presents for Sarah and Craig and new pants. I might actually have club pants now. Well, my version of such. Which means I am done, because I don't think they make strappy black shoes like I want. I'm very upset I lost the pair I had in one of the moves while at university.

Yes, I bought guy pants for my dress pants. Heh. I will have to hem them and do a few little alterations and very fast because they won't be here until Monday or Tuesday, but still, they fit better and are nice and simple. I also bought guy shirts yesterday. Guy clothes are just so much better. My work clothes are guy polos and jeans, too.

I do wear woman shoes, though. I've worn guy boots in the past, but right now they are all woman.

This weekend I have so much to do. Gah.

Woe! I just realized (yesterday) I will be in Orlando with thestalkycop and scouseboy when Serenity is released. I'd planned on attending in costume with people here. I still want to see it opening night, and probably in some sort of costume. I wonder if I can drag them with me? I wonder if I can convince them to dress up? They've not even seen Firefly. (I know! Sarah is not perfect, but she is still super speshul!!11!!)

Of course, since I've seen Serenity twice already, I could wait until I came home.


...

No, I don't think so.

I bet it will be harder to get tickets opening night in Orlando than St. Louis. Anyone in Orlando? Any suggestions?

Also, a warning. There will be squee between now and September 24, when I fly to Orlando to meet up with my bestest best friend and some other people. (I kid, Craig and Sarah's mum. You're are both super speshul too!) I will try to restrain the squee, but it is difficult.

We may post fandomy things, since I will take my laptop.

Argh. Must go away again now. Sister K wants to watch a movie and I have to find transportation to her house. J ran off with my car to go visit his sister, who just moved to right outside Nashville and is much closer than her previous location in California.